No single woman should have to feel like a "Spinster" just because she is single.
I mean what century are we living in, anyway?
According to a
Study, Single Women Still Feel the Spinster Stigma.
Why?
Here is an Excerpt:
"We found that never-married women's social environments are characterized by pressure to conform to the conventional life pathway," said Larry Ganong, co-chair of Human Development and Family at the University of Missouri. "Heightened visibility came from feelings of exposure, and invisibility came from assumptions made by others."
For example, the study subjects said they felt more visible in situations such as bouquet tosses at weddings, which prompted unwanted, intrusive questions about the their marriage status. Yet the respondents also felt invisible in society, with others assuming they were married and had children, and ignoring the reality of single women. The subjects often felt people expected them to justify or explain their singlehood.
The women also reported other difficulties tied to their social status:
Awareness of shifting realities as they become older, such as the shrinking pool of eligible men;
Reminders that they are on different life paths than most women when others inquire about their single status;
Feelings of insecurity and displacement in their families when parents and siblings remark about their singlehood and make jokes or rude comments.
While one might think these annoyances become worse with age, the researchers actually found that dealing with single stigma is the worst for women in their mid-20's through mid-30's, while women older than age 35 tend to be more content with being single and don't express as much dissatisfaction as do younger women.
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This is outrageous. These woman's feelings are a direct product of a fucked up society which tells us that you must get married and have children in order to live a fulfilling life.
My own experience is not so different. As a 24 yr old female who has had only one boyfriend and no dreams of kids or marriage, I encounter these problems and feelings often.
I can not even begin to describe how irritated I am with this.
Women are caring and compassionate creatures by nature, and can contribute so much to the world around them. A women does not need a man to be fulfilled. That is some bullshit leftover from generations before us, when women had little choice or freedom. It is also some bullshit brought on by Religion and it's obsession with marriage and gender roles.
I get lonely, and sometimes I announce in frustration: I need a man! However, while I would love some arms around me and a forehead kiss, my life does not feel any less satisfying because I am single. In fact, so much more opportunity and curiosity is available to me.
Most importantly, I will not settle. Unless something extraordinary happens and I meet my soulmate, I will be single, and I will be happy. I will not just make the next compatible man my boyfriend.
Compatibility is NOT enough. Nope, not for me.
According to the "Study" I only have a year left before I am entering "Spinster" territory.
The proof comes on Facebook, watching so many of my peers have kids and get married.
It seems like that is ALL anyone wants to do with their life!
